twilight 3

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33	Stefani Mayer

    I always knew that will be other. Hoped that will become strong, as Edvard and said.
    To Stanu strong and rapid, and that topmost, beautiful. I will become such, that it is not ashamed it was to stand next to Edvardom, to the figure to him more even.
    I tried not to think about other things. About savagery, about thirst of blood. Can I will not be indeed able to keep from murder of people. Unknown, those, whoever never caused me wicked. The same people, as the increased list of victims is in Seattle, who had families, friends and future. People which had their life. And I, possibly, will become a that monster which will take everything from them.
    But, sooth to the say, I will undergo it, because trusted Edvardu, trusted fully, he will be able to stop me from all that about what I can pozhalet' later. I knew, he would drive away me to Antarctic Region, hunts on penguins, if I will ask him. And I will do everything, only to become good. Good vampirshey. Such idea, in other time, would pozabavila me, if it were not for the new experiencing.
    Because, if will I become such and true, as well as those catechumens, from nightmarish visions, what Jasper drew in my head – will be it I? And if all, that will I want – it only to kill people, that will happen with my nowaday desires?
    Edvard experienced so, that I missed out nothing of the human experiencing. Usually, it seemed foolishly. Little, what human experiencing I will miss on. In fact will I be with Edvardom, that to me yet to want?
    I looked at his person, while he looked after how Karlayl was engaged in my hand. There was nothing in this world, what I wanted more than it. Does it can to change?
    Was there some human experiencing from which I will not want to renounce?
    

Chapter 16
Epoch

    
    – I have nothing to put on! – I complained to itself.
    Boxes and shelves opusteli, all of my clothes had been thrown out on a bed. I was dreamily covered in emptiness of closet, as if expecting that nothing suitable materializes there.
    My skirt of khaki hung on the back of arm-chair of kachalki, expecting, while I will find out anything, exactly suitable to it. Something, in what I will look beautiful and grown man. Clothes about which it is boldly possible it will be to say – «for the special cases». To me so nothing and it was not succeeded to find.
    Already, just about, it is needed it was to go out, and I was still dressed in the darling old sporting suit. And if I will find nothing rather better, in this heap of clothes, and all looked just like this, on exhaust me it will be necessary to go exactly in him. I was sullenly covered on the heap of clothes on a bed.
    An impediment was in that I knew exactly, what I had dressed, be this thing still in place – my stolen red blouse. I struck to down the wall a healthy hand.
    it is the Dull, thievish, annoying vampire! – I growled.
    – What did I do? – asked Alice.
    It stood, carelessly leaning one's the elbows near the opened window, as if was here all of time.
    – Tuk, tuk, – it added with a smile.
    – Really, so hardness to wait while I will open a door?
    It gave up a flat, white box on a bed. – I simply passed by. Thought, that possibly you may need clothes.
    I looked at a large box lying over, not pleasing me, cloak-room and squirmed an ugly face.
    – Acknowledge, – Alice said. – I am your rescuer.
    – You are my rescuer, – I mumbled. – Thank you.
    – That, it is pleasant to do something it is correct, for a change. you do not present, as far as it irritates – I do not have flashbacks about so much things. I feel such unavailing. Such. normal. – Alice poezhilas' from this terrible word.
    – I even can not itself present as far as it the terrible feeling. To be normal? Ugh. – with a jeer, I added.
    It began to the laugh. – Well though, it compensates that disappeared together with an annoying thief – and now I need to understand, whatever I see in Seattle.
    When it explained everything just like this – collecting two situations in one suggestion – all became clear. It elusive something, disturbing me whole days, important connection which I could not catch in any way, all became clear unexpectedly. I was covered on Alice, on my face one hardened the same, last, expression.
    are you, really, not going to open? – it asked. Breathed, when I so was not stirred, and quickly opened a box. It fished out something and got on the hip, but I could not be concentrated, that it was.
    – Pretty, true? I chosen a blue color, because know – Edvardu likes, when you carry blue.
    I did not listen.
    it is all the same, – I whispered.
    – That, the same? – it asked. – you have nothing like. And in general, that to declare such, you have too little clothes, only one skirt!
    – No, Alice! Forget about clothes, listen!
    – You dislike? – the face of Alice grew fog disappointment.
    – Listen, Alice, you do not notice really? It the same! That, who climbed to us and stole my things, and new vampires in Seattle. They in concert!
    Clothes glissaded from its fingers and fallen down back in a box.
    Alice was quickly concentrated, its voice had become sharp unexpectedly. – Why do you think so?
    – does Remember, what was talked by Edvard? About that someone utillizes holes in your visions, that could not you see catechumens? And then yet, you talked before, that time was neat very well, as my thief is exact was, with anybody not to clash, he knew as though, that you would see it. Think, you were rights, Alice, I think, he knew. I think, he utillized those holes also. And what coincidence, that two raznykh of man, not only does know sufficiently about you, that to do such, but decide to do everything at one and the same time? It can not be. It is one person. The same. That, who creates an army, he and stole my smell.
    Alice not privykla, that it was surprised. It stopped beating for a long time, and I already began mentally to consider waited while. It did not move during two minutes. Then its eyes again sfokusirovalis' on me.
    – You are right, – it said by empty voice. – Certainly, you are right. And when you laid down everything so..
    – Edvard understood everything it is wrong, – I whispered. – This was proverka.chtob to see will work, or not. Whether a thief will be able to enter and go out, in total ignorance, making nothing out of that you will be able to see. Type, attempt to put to death me.And, he did not take my personal things, that to prove that found me. He stole my smell. so that other could find me.
    Its eyes became round in Choquet. I was rights, and it was visible that it also understood everything.
    – About, it is not, – it exclaimed soundless.
    I did not expect already, that my heartfelt equilibrium would settle into a shape. While I thought over circumstance that someone created the army of vampires – army which pitilessly killed dozens of people in Seattle – with one purpose, to destroy me, I felt the attack of facilitation.
    Partly, because at last able to understand, what there was that important, that I could not catch in any way.
    But, mostly, I calmed down to on quite to other reason.
    – What, – I whispered, – All can be weakened. Eventually, nobody tries to destroy Kallenov.
    – If you think that something changes it, you wrong. – Alice said through teeth. – If someone wants one of us, he will have to deal with all of other.
    – Thank you, Alice. But, at least, we know why they came. It must help.
    – Possibly, – mumbled Alice. It began to walk back and forth on a room.
    Bukh, bukh – it was knocked a fist to me in a door.
    I jumped up. Alice, seems, did not even notice.
    – are not you yet ready? We will be late! – Charley complained, his voice sounded angrily. Charley did not love important measures, similarly as well as I. In his case, a main problem was in that to be dressed up.
    – Almost. Give me a minute, – I said hoarsely.
    On a second he suppressed. are you that does cry?
    – No. I am nervous. Leave.
    I heard, as he loudly protopal on a stair.
    – I need to leave, – Alice whispered.
    – Why?
    – Edvard already will be soon. If he will hear it.
    – Leave, leave! – I reacted quickly. Edvard will come in fury, when will know. I will not be able long to hide from him, but possibly ceremony of handing of diplomas, the best not time for his reaction.
    – Put it on, quick. – Alice ordered, shooting out from a window.
    I did that it said, and stunned the conjecture, dressed.
    Planned more refined to put hairs, but time was not already, so that they hung, as in any other day, straight and boring. It did not matter. I was not troubled even to look at itself in a mirror, so that did not even present as a woman's jacket, complimented with Alice, looked at oneself with a skirt. It also was it is unimportant. I kicked about through a hand a disgusting yellow synthetic final mantle and made a haste downward.
    – You look well, – Charley said by the restrained tone, already rasserzhennyy. – It new?
    – Aha, – I mumbled, trying to be concentrated. – Alice gave me it. Thank you.
    Edvard arrived only in a few minutes, after the care of sister. I did not have time, to calm down. But while we rode in the machine of Charley, Edvarda did not have possibility to ask me, what is the matter.
    Charley zaupryamilsya, when it knew that I going to go by a ceremony with Edvardom. And I could understand him – parents have a right to accompany children in the day of exhaust. I gladly yielded to him it right. And Edvard offered with readiness, that we departed all together. Karlayl and it was not experienced Esme on this occasion, so that Charley was not able to find a solid argument against this idea, he, not very much gladly, but consented. And now, Edvard rode at the back seat of squad car, after dividing bulletproof glass, with merry expression on face – probably because my father, also, was very merry. Each time Charley threw a look in the mirror of back kind on him, the smile of Edvarda became all wider and wider, That meant – Charley thought about things which say he them aloud, will so much unhinge me.
    – With you it is all right? – Edvard whispered, helping me get out from a machine on the school parking.
    – Nervous, – I answered, and did not even utter a lie.
    – You are so wonderful, – he said.
    It seemed that he had wanted to add something yet, but Charley wedged oneself in a manoeuvre which must was be unnoticeable between you and me and put the hand to me on shoulders.
    – are excited you? – he asked me.
    – Not Very much. – I was acknowledged.
    it is Bella, the same is very important. Your issue from school. Now for you the real world was opened. College. Independent life.you already not my little girl. – at the end of suggestion for Charley slightly intercepted a throat.
    – Dads, – I moaned. – Please, be not such sentimental.
    – Who is sentimental? – he mumbled. – And why are not excited you?
    – does not know, dad. I think, did not simply yet have time to realize.
    it is good, that Alice arranges this evening-party. you need something, that to be emboldened.
    – Certainly. Evening-party, it that needs me.
    Charley nasmeshil by tone, what I pronounced it, and he squeezed my shoulders. Edvard looked at clouds, his person was thoughtful.
    My father had to abandon us before back included in a sporting hall, and to go round school to the main entrance together with other parents.
    Large stolpotvorenie happened, when the missis of Koup from a main office and Mr. Varner, teacher of mathematics tried to line up us in alphabetical order.
    – Forward, Mr. Kalen, – Mr. Varner roared to Edvardu.
    it is Hello, Bella!
    I turned to Jessica Stenly, smiling, it waved me from the end of rank.
    Edvard kissed me quickly, breathed and went to become with those, who on the letter of K. Elis it was not there. That going it to do? To skip exhaust? From my point of view, not very much good idea. It is necessary it was me to be quiet to completion exhaust.
    – Go here, Bella! – Jessica called once again.
    I went by the end of rank, that to take the place after Jessica, slightly zainteresovavshis', why so suddenly friendliness woke up in it. When I walked up nearer, Angela, standing for five persons back, noticed what, looked after Jessica with that curiosity.
    Before, I walked up so, that to hear, Jess stirred already.
    –. so surprisingly. I want to say, it seems that we met only, and now we are already produced together, – it fired. – can you trust that all made off? I want to yell!
    – to me also, – I mumbled.
    – It all so incredibly. Do you remember the first day here? We became friends at once. From the first time, as soon as saw each other. Surprisingly. I now ride to California, and you will depart on Alaska, and I will very much on you miss! you must promise, that we necessarily will meet sometimes! I am so glad that you will have an evening-party. It fine. Because, we actual little time conducted together lately and we all depart now.
    It all taratorila and taratorila, I had been uverenna, that an unexpected return to our friendship happened due to nostalgia from exhaust and in gratitude for invitations on an evening-party, personally I here was at anything. I listened it so, as far as could, while pulled on the mantle. And I understood that a soviet was, to that relationships with Jessica will make off on a good note.
    Because, this was an end, and did not matter, that Erik- a graduating student which pronounced valedictory wanted to say, speaking about a starting point, implying «beginning» and all other banal nonsense. All of us today abandoned something behind, maybe, I abandoned some more what other.
    All stepped out briskly so. Seemed, as though I pushed the button of the rapid backwinding. Was all so planned? And Erik talked very quickly, nervous, words and phrases took off helter-skelter, sense to catch it was difficult. Director Grin began to cause on the last names, one after other practically not doing pauses, and beginning of turn from the students of standings in sporting hall, hurried to take away diplomas. Poor missis of Koup all earthed in diplomas, trying to give a director correct, that he handed the proper student.
    I saw as Alice, unexpectedly appearing, walked on the stage dancing gait, that to take away it, there was expression a deep concentration on its face. Edvard followed at once by it, expression of his person was confused, but not off-tune. Only they could carry it disgusting yellow and to look it is similarly good as usual. By the of this the place not beauty and grace, they were selected from crowd. Interestingly me, as I could trust in general, that they are people. Pair of angels, lyings up with the exposed wings, would be less noticeable.
    I heard, as Mr. Grin named my name, rose from the chair and waited, while turn ahead, will move. It became blundering me from greetings of reported from the side of back included in a sporting hall, I looked around, and Dzheykoba of heaving up Charley saw to itself, both they whistled and yelled, heartening me. I was able to consider the top of head of Billy next to an elbow Jake only. And compelled itself to squeeze out certain similarity of smile for them.
    Mr. Grin finished with the list of the last names, and then continued to hand diplomas with a dull smile, when we befitted in turn.
    – Congratulate, miss of Stenly, – he mumbled, when Jess took away it.
    – Congratulate, miss of Svon, – he mumbled to me, giving a diploma in my healthy hand.
    – Thank you, – I answered quietly.
    And all made off.
    I got up next to Jessica, wherein all of graduating students going. Under eyes Jess had red spots, and it continued to wipe everything person by the sleeve of the mantle. A second was enough to consider that it cries.
    Mr. Grin said something, whatever I caught, and all round me loudly began to the cry and zagolosili. A yellow rain was strewed from hats. I took off it too late, and simply gave it to fall down on earth.
    – About, Bella! – Dzhes began to the sob, recovering the hum of talks around. – I can not trust that we made off.
    – I can not trust also, that all ended, – I mumbled.
    It obkhvatila me hands for a neck. – you must promise me, that we will not lose connection.
    Hugging it in reply, I felt an ill at an ease a bit, avoiding its request:
    – I am so glad that Jessica met with you. These were good two years.
    – Exactly, – it breathed and bustled a nose. Then it produced me from cuddles. – Loren! – it squealed, waving a hand and squeezing in crowd of yellow mantles. Relatives began to meet, squeezing all nearer to each other.
    I met a look with Andzheloy and Ben, but they were surrounded the families. I will congratulate them later.
    I fished out a neck, looking out Alice.
    – Congratulate, – whispered me in an ear Edvard, his hands twined round my waist. His voice was muffled; for the sake of me he took it easy to attain this special day.
    it is Mm, thank you.
    it is Something unlike, that you calmed down, – he noticed.
    – Yet not quite.
    – what can you yet worry From? From an evening-party? It will not be so terrible.
    – Probably, you are right.
    – Who do you search?
    My search was not unnoticed, as I raschityvala. it is Alice, where it?
    it is escaped at once, as soon as got the diploma.
    His voice began to the sound differently. I turned, that to look at his confused person, when he looked at the back entrance of sporting hall, and I accepted an impulsive decision – from those, when it is better it was to think twice, but I rarely do just like this.
    – does Worry after Alice? – I asked.
    – E. – he did not want to answer.
    – And what did it think about? That you were not able to know its idea.
    His look went down on my person, and eyes narrowed with suspicion. – Generally, it translated the battle hymn of Republic into Arabic one. When it finished with it, it passed to Korean.